The New York Initiative for Children of Incarcerated Parents is asking professionals, organizations and family members to write letters urging legislators to support the closures of four prisons and the Kinship Guardianship Assistance program, two measures in the proposed NY state budget.

The prisons slated for closure are the minimum security Lyon Mountain Correctional Facility in Clinton County, the minimum security Moriah Shock Incarceration Correctional Facility in Essex County, the minimum security portion of Butler Correctional Facility in Wayne County, and the medium security Ogdensburg Correctional Facility in St. Lawrence County.

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The prisons are remote—there is not one city with a population over 25,000 within 125 miles of them, the Initiative said. They are also under capacity: When you divide the total number of prisoners in the four facilities by the total number of employees, you get one state employee for every 1.5 prisoners, New York Times columnist Jim Dwyer pointed out.

The state’s prison population has dropped nearly 8 percent in the last three years, and is expected to decrease by another 1,000 people by the end of the year, the Department of Correctional Services said. The proposed prison closures would save $46 million, DOCS said.

But more importantly, the closures would create a chance for incarcerated parents to be moved to prisons closer to their children and families, said Tanya Krupat, program director of The New York Initiative for Children of Incarcerated Parents.

“Keeping [incarcerated] people closer to home will help families maintain their relationships and benefit children because being closer to their parents will increase the likelihood that they can visit them, and the parents will be able to more actively parent their children,” Krupat said.

“And certainly for children in foster care, they’re more likely to be able to see their parents than if they’re incarcerated far away, because distance is a significant barrier to visiting at all.”

A number of children in foster care would also benefit from the Kinship Guardianship Assistance program in the Governor’s proposed Education, Labor and Family Assistance bill, which would provide financial assistance to family members dedicated to caring for the child of an incarcerated parent permanently, but would leave the parent’s rights intact.

Although the families would receive financial assistance, the state would save money because it wouldn’t have to monitor them the way it would if the children remained in foster care, Krupat said.

Because of another journalistic opportunity, I will no longer be contributing to the Family Life Behind Bars website.  However, as I bid farewell, I’ve gained experiences that will I’ll carry with me into my next endeavor.

Besides assisting Sandeep with maintaining the website, the experience that stands out the most is my position as the web radio host.  In this role, I was able to interview those that have been directly affected by incarceration: from a father sentenced to 15 years under the Rockefeller Drug Laws, to a grandmother who was paying hundreds of dollars in collect call fees.  As someone who has also had both family members and friends behind bars, their stories not only resonated with the listeners who tuned in, but with me personally.

I wish the website much success in it’s mission and continued commitment to bringing these stories to the forefront.

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Listen Now: Financial advice for families and the formerly incarcerated

This weeks column focuses on what to do if a loved one is dying in prison. I have provided some resources regarding medical release and grief counseling for families facing this sad situation. If you or someone you know is affected by this issue, the resources included in the video column are:

If you are a child of someone who is incarcerated and you have a question for me, you have three options:

1. Post a question in the comments section below,
2. Send an email to questions@livesinfocus.org,
3. Call (646) 867-1891 to leave a message.

I also welcome questions from others who might simply be interested in knowing more about how the life of children is affected when a parent is incarcerated.

SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS: Have you turned to support groups and how did that help you through this time in your life?

[Use the comments feature below or call (646) 867-1891 to leave an audio message.]

(Suzette Soltero wrote the following poem while visiting her ex-husband who is serving 28 years and has completed 18 so far):

Suzette with her ex-husband

The trip is dreadful, lots of trees pretty houses and women with children in a van going to visit loved ones that have been away in “confined quarters.”

Long roads with minimal lights & cars while still dark outside everyone trying to make themselves comfortable trying to sleep until their arrival and the driver calls out the facility’s name.

Writing information on a piece of paper, informing who you are.

Lockers holding belongings that aren’t permitted while you walk thru scanners hoping you don’t ring.

Florecent number stamping on the right hand slamming heavy doors bob-wires tall walls blue uniforms w/badges some w/hard faces others more relaxed greet you.

Escorted walks assigned seats & bells ringing while grown men in green come out the designated door giving a quick hello while they walk to check in.

Hugs, kisses, hand shakes, pounds, happy eyes, big smiles change for the vending machines singles for pics which capture the days visit five hours of conversation, memories, hopes & dreams children crying, playing happiness sadness – emotions, feelings all trapped in the visit room guarded by those blue uniforms w/badges as they look at every movement that is done.

The clock ticks & times flies & the moment to depart approaches like a thief in the night.

Emptiness fills the room as everyone prepares for that moment.  Children pull their daddy’s crying saying “let’s go” for they don’t understand.  Mothers, wives, girlfriends, significant others try to be strong as they say goodbye not to make the men in the green feel worse but emptiness fills the room.

A too familiar feeling as those heavy doors open & close behind you you feel as half your soul in left and entwined with the bob-wires handing the paper back getting your belongings & boarding the van again to see those long roads with minimal lights & a few more cars filling the highway.

All you remember is the smile try to rewind the moment you spend as you look at the picture breathing it all in until you feel it in your heart closing your eyes thinking, wondering what does the man in green feel right at that very moment.

Maybe one day your soul will be untwined & you will feel whole again but for now all you have to look forward too is “THE VISIT!”

When you have a big moment ahead, something you’ve been fretfully awaiting, you rehearse that second over and over in your mind.

When it finally arrives, the reality is that we often react in a way we never anticipated.

Here’s a moment you all can relate to: the moment your loved one finally walks into the house after a prison term.

What’s the first thing you will say to your loved one the moment he or she returns home after prison?

[See results here. No results? Then be the first to share what you will say.]

The first thing people will say when his or her loved one returns home:

No results? Then be the first to share what you will say!

We’re moving to more engaging neighborhood!

After two years of enduring an incessant stream of spam at our Ning community site, we are moving to Facebook where people can actually share their thoughts, feelings and experiences without someone trying to sell them Viagra.

Within 24 hours of publicizing the Facebook group page, people have began to ask questions, post comments and really to form a sense of community.

We hope you’ll join us there to share your own experiences or expertise with the growing community.

Thanks!

Sandeep

We just received a question by telephone that needs your attention.

The question comes in response to a recent post about struggling to care for a loved one in prison who is very ill.

Does anyone have advice for Elizabeth, whose husband is dying of cancer in a prison in Jacksonville, Florida? Please listen to the audio and post your comments below. I will call her and pass on all your advice. Thank you! [UPDATE: Our community columnist, Makeba Lavan, provides advice about dealing with a relative who is sick in prison in her video piece.]

(The caller’s personal identity and phone number were edited out of the message. Leave advice in the comments section and I will make sure they receive it–thanks!)

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